Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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