i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Randomize
