Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
