she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I have already put on my inside pants.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
