Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
True but thats because hes a fetus.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Randomize