He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
