I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
So vagazzling was a success
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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