she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
