This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
