yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
