I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize