Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
