How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
