community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
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