I hope mine doesn't look like that
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
