Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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