What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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