Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Randomize
