He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize