Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Randomize
