She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Randomize
