Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
When are your genitals available?
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
