I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
farters have to be the big spoon...
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
