Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
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