I need help removing her.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
My feet surprised me
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