Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
i think im in europe. pls send help
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
Randomize
