dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Randomize
