This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
my poor anus
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
