You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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