ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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