are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
false alarm. still invincible.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
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