The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Randomize
