making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Randomize
