Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
