sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Randomize
