shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
