I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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