Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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