dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
soo... how was my night?
Randomize
