I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize