was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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