The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
