I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize