6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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