8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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