YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
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