Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Randomize
