Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I know her cup size but not her name....
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
