i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
My vagina is very pro this idea
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