where am i from again
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
