is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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